Post by vajramukti on Dec 12, 2008 16:50:16 GMT -5
8. NOBODY WAKES UP IN THE MORNING CHOOSING TO BE THE VILLAIN.
Everyone alive thinks that they’re the “good guy.” He or she is the hero in their version of the story. They have a reason for what they do - even if it’s impractical or unworkable or has evil consequences.
People who are troublesome aren’t worth changing. Don’t even waste time complaining about them.
If someone hurts you, it’s not about you and you shouldn’t act like it was. People do what they do because of their own inner reality. Learn what you can do differently the next time, then forgive them and move on.
Really. Forgive them completely. And then, figure out how to manage, tolerate or avoid them in the future.
By the way, forgiving doesn’t mean that you think whatever they did is okay. It’s NOT okay. But here’s the thing - if you don’t forgive someone you can’t ever let it go. Then you have to go around with this burden of anger and sourness. Wasn’t the original hurt enough for you? Why would you want to preserve it and remember it? Or them?
Carrying grudges ties up brain cells that you could use to make life sweeter for yourself and those you love. So, after you forgive them, forgive yourself for getting hurt - and then LET IT GO!
Everyone alive thinks that they’re the “good guy.” He or she is the hero in their version of the story. They have a reason for what they do - even if it’s impractical or unworkable or has evil consequences.
People who are troublesome aren’t worth changing. Don’t even waste time complaining about them.
If someone hurts you, it’s not about you and you shouldn’t act like it was. People do what they do because of their own inner reality. Learn what you can do differently the next time, then forgive them and move on.
Really. Forgive them completely. And then, figure out how to manage, tolerate or avoid them in the future.
By the way, forgiving doesn’t mean that you think whatever they did is okay. It’s NOT okay. But here’s the thing - if you don’t forgive someone you can’t ever let it go. Then you have to go around with this burden of anger and sourness. Wasn’t the original hurt enough for you? Why would you want to preserve it and remember it? Or them?
Carrying grudges ties up brain cells that you could use to make life sweeter for yourself and those you love. So, after you forgive them, forgive yourself for getting hurt - and then LET IT GO!
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